Where is it written in the Bible “tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you who you are”? Is this sentence really a Bible verse? In this study, we will see 4 passages from the Holy Bible that bring us interesting life lessons similar in some way to this popular saying.
The meaning of the saying “tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you who you are”, is simple:
It’s just that a person’s character can be evaluated from the friendships with which he lives. That is, our everyday companions can provide others with “a clue” to what kind of person we are.
Our friendships influence our behavior, modify our habits, make us frequent new and different places, also use new words, expressions or slang; they also make us think in new ways, they influence our opinions, even our way of dressing and combing our hair is sometimes influenced, isn’t it true?!
Have you experienced any of the above changes in the way you live, think or speak, influenced by your friendships? I believe that all of us have had this experience at one time.
Therefore, it is sometimes possible to know who a person really is by assessing who their daily companions are. That is why it is also said, “show me who your friends are, and I will tell you what you are.”.
Although these phrases even bring us good life lessons, it is important to say that they are not written in the Holy Bible! So we need to be careful not to create “new verses”.
But if “tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you who you are” isn’t written in the Bible, why do people say so confidently that it is?
The reasons are many, among them:
- from listening to others talk so much, they end up saying it too;
- it’s easier to say something is written (as many say it is) than to take the time to do some research for yourself,
- the “tradition” brought it from the time of my grandfather and great-grandfather, etc.
- “So-and-so said it is written, he “studies” the Bible, so I believe it is written there too!”
But let’s stop going around the subject and let’s open the Bible to think about a few things.
1st Verse about “tell me who you walk with, and I will tell you who you are”: Proverbs 13:20.
He who walks with the wise will become wise,
(CJB)
but the companion of fools will suffer.
As we see in this verse above, whoever walks with wise, intelligent and/or sensible people will certainly become wise too. But whoever walks with fools will be brutalized; that is, he will lose or diminish his reasoning powers or sensitivity; i.e. he will become stupid.
If our companions are good, they will certainly add good things to our life, but whoever mixes with pork, eats bran…
Another saying states that you become who you hang out with. So, can two people walk together if they don’t agree? (Am 3:3) Neither will a person become wiser or intelligent by living with brutish or foolish people.
2Âş VersĂculo: Salmo 1:1.
How blessed are those
(CJB)
who reject the advice of the wicked,
don’t stand on the way of sinners
or sit where scoffers sit!
Did you know that our companions also influence the path to our happiness?
You’ve probably memorized this psalm already, haven’t you?! Let’s analyze some details of each sentence in it, read on:
Do not follow the advice of the wicked!
The Bible talks a lot about advice. Indeed, it is very good to hear them so that we can consolidate and mature our plans, as well as make correct decisions in life (Pr 15:22).
But if our companions are foolish, arrogant, bad-natured people who only do foolish things in life, unhappy will we be if we follow their advice, don’t you agree?!
But even so, there are many people out there following the advice of the wicked…
Do not imitate the conduct of sinners!
Sinners (i.e. transgressors of divine principles) only take pleasure in things that satisfy them. They often hurt and harm other people, but it doesn’t matter to them. They also hardly care about the future consequences of their actions, the important thing is to do what they want now!
As some say, “You are who you hang out with”, so it’s not interesting to spend time with such types of people. That’s why Psalm 1 says: Blessed is he who does not walk in the way of sinners. Furthermore, another Proverb says: A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in speaking his mind. (Proverbs 18:2)
Those who enjoy sin also become blind to see the damage and harm that their own actions and words do to others and to themselves, as they behave as they see fit.
Those who enjoy sin also become blind to see the harm and harm their own actions and words do to others and themselves, for they behave as they see fit (cf. Prov. 4:19).
As the saying goes, “who you hang out with is who you become”, so we can get hurt by hanging out with those kinds of people, can’t we?!
Do not sit in the seat of scoffers!
We can classify the scoffers as those people who don’t respect others, don’t assume their own responsibilities and live making fun of life.
They are usually insensitive, unsympathetic and unfeeling people. who don’t put themselves in the other’s shoes when they say or do something bad. They also don’t care if they’re offending someone with their words, because they really like to make fun.
The worst thing is that sometimes they look like fun, and that’s why, when we live with such human beings, it doesn’t take so long for us to imitate what they do. But the practice of evil brings with it its consequences, the master Yeshua himself once said that, on the day of judgment, people will give account of the useless words they said (Mt 12:36; cf. Eph 5:4).
3rd Verse: 1st Corinthians 15:33.
Don’t be fooled. “Bad company ruins good character.”
(CJB)
Well, this biblical verse is basically stating that what is good can become bad…
Who has never had the experience of meeting a new person, which at first seemed like a nice friendship, but with time of coexistence ends up being badly influenced by it?! When that happens, and we absorb that person’s bad behavior, other people who used to like to live with us start to find us strange, so they move away from us, right?!
If this new person is inserted, for example, in one of the three types of human beings mentioned in Psalm 1:1, which we read above, it is inevitable that our habits, words and behavior will be corrupted.
Therefore, we must be very careful not to contaminate ourselves with bad influences and corrupt our good customs. Otherwise, if someone says to us, “tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you who you are”, would we feel safe showing him our friendships?
And isn’t it bad that we are judged on the basis of someone else’s conduct? But that person you spend your time with is who you become.
And how uncomfortable it is when we are compared with other people, equating our character with someone else’s. But sometimes the judgments that others make of us are true.
4th Bible Verse about “tell me who you walk with and I will tell you who you are”: 1 John 1:7.
But if we are walking in the light, as he is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of his Son Yeshua purifies us from all sin.
(CJB)
Walking in the light here, as an application, can have a few different interpretations, but one of them is certainly about our everyday friendships or companions.
If we live with good people who inspire us and serve as a good influence, who bring us closer to divine values, we certainly feed lives purified from evil. But otherwise, “abyss calls out to abyss…”
Also, if someone really asked you, “tell me who you hang out with”, would you feel embarrassed to say who your friends are?
If we feel ashamed of who our friendships are. So we should ask ourselves at least these two questions:
- “Are my current friendships really good for me?” or
- “What is wrong with me that I am embarrassing myself with such a person?”
As we can see in this brief Bible study, the phrase “tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you who you are”, despite not being written in the Bible, teaches us good lessons in life.
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